For February 2nd, 2003
Viva Nova
We go north of the border to interview this week's Hotpunkgirl in her secret, underground bunker in the frigid Canadian wilderness. After her butler lets us in and seats us with a tray of refreshments, we thaw out and begin.
"So, what do you think of the state of modern music?"
KoRn-hating wildwoman Viva Nova takes a sip of her almond amaretto coffee and smiles.
"It's got its ups. It's got its downs. But you should have seen how quickly Fred Durst went down when I kicked him in the groin for hitting on me at a comic book convention. His squealing like a baseball bat-crippled schoolgirl was the sweetest music you could ever imagine. I suppose his Bizkit was Limp for a while! Best of all, though? I took a Vasquez-signed first printing of Johnny the Homicidal Maniac that he was holding, and he couldn't do a fucking thing about it!"
"Fucking pussy." She adds with a satisfied nod of her pretty head.
She does, however, enjoy a full variety of non-nu-metal bands and performers ranging from Einsturzende Neubauten to Ministry to Hank Rollins to Skinny Puppy to David Bowie to New Order. But she's really moved by the heavy stuff.
"The heavier, the better!" She says. "If the singer growls like he's been impaled on a giant stake and left to die in the middle of a blood-soaked battlefield, and the guitars shake your sternum with heart-stopping intensity so that it's actually hard to breathe, I might really like it!"
Over the course of time we spend enjoying Ms. Nova's hospitality, we learn that she collects Living Dead Dolls, reads several books a week, enjoys the splendor of the Canadian autumn, derives incalculable pleasure from waxing her eyebrows, draws life-sized pictures of Don Knotts, digs drum n' bass, and invents her own alphabets from scratch. Still, this is but the tip of the enigma that is Viva Nova! Go and pay her a visit at her website, join her Yahoo! group, and drop her an email telling her you'd just love to buy her a lifetime supply of books and Chanel makeup of her choosing. Don't delay! She's a sweetheart, but her patience with you is wearing thin.
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