For March 15th, 2004
Kathy
From the brisk plains of Norwalk, Ohio (it's one hour west of Cleveland. You've heard of Cleveland, yeah?) comes Kathy, the nefarious (but ultimately fun-loving) brains behind an operation known to more than 4,000 indie, goth, hardcore, emo, & punk kids as the Only Undies Club. It's a movement, to be sure, but instead of waving banners and flags to rally others to the cause, these skivvie-shaking debauches galavant about -- in public, no less -- wearing little more than single layers of fabric covering only their most private of parts! Kathy goads the masses into their wickedly shameless displays of anti-Victorian splendor primarily by hosting underwear dancing parties where, as Kathy says, only "awesome punk rock from the late '70s and '80s" is played (see pictures of these bacchinallian free-for-alls here and here).
"You'll hear no ghetto booty shaking music," continues Kathy. "We expect you to keep your undies on, after all!"
Want to attend an Only Undies Club function but you're a little short on...shorts? Kathy's got your solution! "Tons of kick ass designs and different styles" are available! Sure, you could show up in jeans and a t-shirt, but do you want everyone there to laugh at you?
When Kathy's not presiding over OUC events, she enjoys lounging about and listening to the soothing sounds of The Dead Boys, The Stooges, Richard Hell, New York Dolls, Lou Reed, and The Velvet Underground. When she really feels like thrashing, though, she digs out the Frank Sinatra and April Stevens albums and croons along from rooftops. She loves to drag her vegetarian boyfriend out to steak houses, but she'll sometimes give him a break and they'll wind up at Que Tal in Cleveland to build their own, "absolutely delicious" burritos. While not generally much of a drinker beyond the summertime refreshment of iced tea, Kathy will sometimes get her buzz on with a buttery nipple. That's an alcoholic beverage, perverts. Look it up!
As Elvis Costello once sang "Welcome to the Working Week," Kathy gives us her take on the hard-knock life of the gainfully employed:
"I work
at a print shop where I have to deal with old people all the time making fun
of my piercings. The mayor even tells me that as soon as I get my piercings
out he's going to give me a kiss. Yeah...I'm in a rush! Hahah! My day job is
graphic design, Web design and printing." (She also confides that she might
kill for money -- as long as the price is right. Like, enough to allow her to
retire from dealing with, well, retirees on a daily basis. Being an ex-Kinko's
galley slave, Captain Tralfaz is inclined to agree!)
Kathy's parting words to her loyal subjects as she takes the throne to reign supreme as Hotpunkgirl of the Week?
"I'm going to Europe in the spring / summer time to visit family and help promote OUC to European countries and hopefully start some underwear parties there! When I come back, I plan to go to the west coast and start them up there in the clubs. OUC UNDERWEAR DANCE PARTY TOUR '04? I think so... Haha!"
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