For July 21st, 2003
Mistress Xena
From her hidden palace suite in the The Sears Tower's loftiest heights, Mistress Xena surveys every square mile of her royal kink-dom with an ever-watchful eye.
"My loyal subjects appreciate my attention to their needs," she says, "All I ask in return is their rigorous devotion and the ability to do everything right the first time I say so. Ah, and their income tax refunds!"
Equally commanding in life's other roles, Mistress Xena sometimes holds court on stage with her band Wired Remorse and as a vinyl-spinning DJ around Chicago. During a recent set at an underground club near the infamous Cabrini Green projects, fan Jimmie Walker was in attendance. When asked how he was enjoying Mistress Xena's musical selections, he was able to articulate repeatedly but one awestruck word.
"DYN-O-MITE! DYN-O-MITE!" He added, "DYN-O-MITE!"
As per usual, Walker was hogtied and naked in the corner. Xena insists it was for everyone's own good and not just because she's a total sadist. Good times were had by all as they were encouraged to smack his bare ass with a ping pong paddle that was provided conveniently nearby.
Aside from the casual sadism, Mistress Xena enjoys occupying her time with interests as varied as web design, modeling, surfing the Internet, watching movies, playing the bass, singing, collecting CDs, collecting boots, swimming, wrestling, boxing, rollerblading, bike-riding, shopping, dancing, performing webcam shows, writing, painting, traveling, and chatting.
Her turn-ons contain all of (and more than) the following: BDSM, spanking, thigh-high boots, corsets, stockings, pantyhose, lingerie, massages, hair extensions/wigs, make-up, nudity, porn, body paint, velvet, latex/rubber/pvc, leather, piercings, and tattoos.
Just make sure her list of turn-offs doesn't include you, punk. To be sure that doesn't happen, the staff of Hotpunkgirl.com heartily recommends that you visit her website, join her Yahoo! group, and buy ten copies of her band's album! Pronto!
If you're feeling extra-special brave, go and see her spin some vinyl at her local club. Just don't be a creepy stalker. She's got ways of dealing with such lowlifes, and, contrary to popular opinion, it's not DYN-O-MITE.
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